I am one of those people who still believes in the sanctity of marriage. I believe that it is recognized by God and I believe that each person that professes their love and devotion, who makes promises before God and witnesses, is responsible spiritually if they do not hold up their end of the bargain.
I have been told by more than a few people since I got married that I am naïve and that I am going to end up hurt because I trust my mate entirely. I trust that he took our vows seriously and I trust that he feels that we are meant to be together. I feel like if I have to second-guess him then we should not have gotten married! I normally tell these people that I am not stupid and that I had a life before my husband. I have seen a lot of things and I have experienced other things so I cannot be as naïve as they think that I am. I tell them that I would know for sure if my husband was cheating because I know most if not all of the signs and here are a few:
1) His schedule starts changing. All of a sudden he has to stay longer hours at work but he doesn’t pick up the phone when I call him and he never returns my call. He claims that he was swamped and had no time to pick up the call. Not saying that this could not be the truth, but a person who is being faithful will pick up even if just to say, “I’m extremely busy but I’ll call you back soon.” (Also depends on what kind of job the suspected cheater has also.)
2) He starts spending nights away from home. If his job does not require him to travel there should be no reason why he spends the night anywhere but on his side of our bed.
3) He is normally a “home-body” but now he prefers to hang out five nights a week with his friends. Uhm…..no! Personally I believe that there is a significant problem with a grown man who prefers to hang out with his friends over being in the company of a woman that he loves and finds attractive. Not that there is anything wrong with getting his “man fun” on, but not in excess.
4) He has no money. What has happened to the money in the bank accounts? Where has it gone? He has no answers and the only reply he offers when he is asked about missing funds is, “I don’t know.” Well let’s see here: if I have not spent it and it is not in the account then that means you have taken it. He is either moving money to other places because he secretly wants to leave the relationship (and is making sure that he has funds…BLAH BLAH BLAH) OR he is spending my damn money on someone else. (He may also have an addiction of some kind but that would not be my first guess if it were me and this is not the blog for that!)
5) He gets calls and texts at weird hours of the day and night but he never picks. Why won’t he answer the phone? Why won’t he text back or if he is texting back, why when I look in the phone all the texts are erased? Hmmmm……
6) Beware of repeated phone calls/texts with no name and just a number!
Of course any one of these signs could be coincidental. There could be valid reasons for all BUT all of these things happening at one time (or in close proximity) with no explanations is quite suspicious in my book. Now these are just a few of the things that would tip me off, what would tip you off?