In many marriages and relationships there often tends to be a struggle for position. What I mean by that is that there is usually some idiotic family member or friend of the wife or husband who doesn’t know their position and who thinks that they should be the most important person in his/her life. This person feels that because they have obviously known the person longer than the significant other, they have been friends for many years with him/her, they have been in dangerous situations along with him//her; that these are valid reasons why they are and should be the most important person in his/her life. All of this regardless of the plain simple truth that they are NOT and NEVER will be more important than the wife or husband.

This person is clearly deranged and be warned, THEY WILL ATTEMPT TO CAUSE PROBLEMS! At first this person will come around as if they have no ulterior motive but as time goes on, it will become very clear that they feel like you are second to them in your spouse’s life. They will try to plant seeds by saying things like, “That’s my friend and I know him/her better than you do.” Take my advice though: don’t play into the game because at the end of the day you can show them better than you can tell them! Your partner’s actions will indeed kill all of the jealous friends ridiculous thought processes (telling the friend that they are no longer welcome to hang around, plainly stating that the friend is retarded, Etc.)

Depending on your religious beliefs you may believe that God blesses marriages and that he said let no man break apart what he has put together. In believing that, you believe that no matter what this brainless, immature human being tries, it will never work. So, fear not! Sit back and watch the show as they try to destroy what you worked hard to build. Stay seated as God steps in and handles it as well. Nine times out of ten the “friend” ends up with hurt feelings BUT now they know their place……Wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy down the list past GOD, spouse, children, family, (mothers, brothers, sisters, etc.) bills, career, groceries, getting new brakes for the car, getting a mani/pedi next week, mowing the lawn, calling grandma to hear her voice, planting flowers in the front yard…..then finally ”friend.”

Here is a bit of advice of all newly married couples: keep people out of your space! The less people you have in your space (living in your home or visiting VERY often) the less issues there will be within your union. Pay attention here! I don’t care if you get a call that someone got hit by a Mack truck and needs a quiet place to heal. Tell them that you think it is in everyone’s best interest that the person heals anywhere but in your space. This is especially if you find that there are little to no issues within your relationship until certain people are introduced into the equation. This is also for those that realize as a couple that while they may have love for others, some of those others clearly do not have real love for them.


4 thoughts on “Tug-of-Position-War

    • Thank you so much for reading and responding! It is such a shame to see things like this happen to people and I hope that whoever you saw go through it was strong enough to fight against it!

  1. Tell it like it is. If I have ever read the truth or spoken the same advise to others, this is the truth. A relationship requires trust and truthful communication, without outside interference. Each person should respectfully shares their concerns with each other with the confidence that their bond is sacred and long lasting.

    No is the shortest, power-filled response that can end the “war.”

    • Thank you so much for taking the time to read and respond! I’m glad to know that someone else sees things how I see things! Personally, “No” is my favorite word of the English language. Lol.

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